The observer and the observed...

I've always like to observe people around me to understand them better and know what they feel. In doing this i've developed a sort of sixth sense that allows me to guess things or even to know what people think of me when they look at me. Some people are surprised by this while others don't even seem to bother. But I think that i'm learning a part of human psychology by myself, through living experience. I don't think i'm discovering new things, i'm only discovering them as I live my everyday life in relationship with people without anyone having to tell me what it is.

Living itself is to be related, if one were not to be related to anyone in any manner and thus don't have any interaction with others, this would merely be life. One is afraid to be alone in this world, cause loneliness is significant to not living by the human mind. When there's is no interaction of the mind with other living creatures, the mind does not feel secure or it rather does not feel like it's alive. Its only when another respond to one's actions that one feels like living. The feeling of insecurity brought by loneliness can bread several conditions in the mind that would in some way or the other be projected outwardly, through one's reaction and behaviour. Everything that is inner becomes the outer. Thus every single person reveals his/her inner through their behaviour in society. So all you have to do is just to know when and how to observe this behaviour because in society, one may fabricate his/her behaviour just to suit the environment, to give the impression of being something else. Living in society has become for many like acting in a real life film, where one intentionally does not project the real personality of oneself. One tends to project the image of a slightly or in some cases much modified image of oneself. Thus it becomes more difficult to observe one's reaction in any given environment. But to err is human, when one is within an appropriate situation or environment, the acting of being someone else gradually ceases and the true personality is revealed. This moslty happen when one feels secure and feels like there's no need to project any kind of image on oneself. This can also happen accidentally when one is talking in an enthusiatic manner where emotions are in play. Because when one is under the influence of what we call emotions, the words that come from the mind to express certain feelings are almost true. Unless of course one is a real master in the art of projecting fabricated outward feelings and behaviour. But I believe that every single person has a psychological weakness, after all its the mind we are talking of here and to begin with observers should become the observed...

Monday morning at office.
I feel like i'm losing the tude, I think I need to find some time for time management. In fact I always tend to plan things at the last minute, but then I find myself having to do so many things. Actually it feels like my life is moving too fast, too fast for me to catch up with... I really need to sit back and have some good thinking about it. Some rest would not be bad either...

Anyway, I spent the week-end at shopping malls, driving to a friend's place etc... Did I do anything interesting? Well not really, I just noticed a cute girl in the mall who smiled at me and for some reason, I did not went to talk to her. Well, if i'm lucky enough I might bump into her some other time. The world is small, everybody meet one day or the other.

Before I forget, which i'm good at, this code might be useful to me sometimes:

Dim oCal As New System.Globalization.GregorianCalendar
Dim iWeek As Integer = oCal.GetWeekOfYear("01/01/2005", Globalization.CalendarWeekRule.FirstDay, Nothing)

MsgBox(iWeek)

My quote for today:
Life is a mess, as long as it stays so it is interesting to live, but as soon as it is tidied up it becomes routine...

So today is another day to office. boring? Yeah feels like. In fact I get bored easily if I start being stuck in a routine. So if there's nothing special or challenging then I feel like moving to somewhere else. Seeing the same faces and walls everyday is kind of freaky sometimes. Anyway, all this to say that I like to work in a challenging environment and the way things are going on in my job righht now, its not that way. So how am I able to stay in this company? Well i'm making my job interesting over here. Some people here have bad plans and I happen to know that. How? Well let's say that my 6th sense is rarely wrong, guess I study people too much.

Well what's the bright side of today? Hey i'm living... that's good news. Life is the best thing one could have and feels great to live. But we are also dying... That's awful, but its life...

inspirone

Well, i've got my own blog now... what is it that i'm gonna say up here, lots of things I guess.
Maybe i'll do like other bloggers by writing about my life except that my life could be more interesting than others... hmmm I wonder if the story of one man is not the story of humanity...

Anyway here I am, a young software engineer that has a life rich of events that needs to be noted somewhere before I leave this world for good.